Advent story, day 13 – Protein injection

Frank: Hi Carol! Whatcha doing?

Carol: I can’t really talk about it on the air. I’ve been sewing for Christmas. That’s all I can say.

Frank: Oh. I’m fully recovered after yesterday’s big cake-off! But you know something?

Carol: What?

Frank: I think I consumed a bit too much sugar yesterday. That darned chocolate icing was delicious.

Carol: Word.

Frank: I think it’s time I called my brother and get him to bring over his barbecue. He’s a barbecue chef.

Carol: A certified BBQ chef? I didn’t know there was such a thing!

Frank: What? Who do you think puts on pig roasts? Total amateurs? Jeez.

Carol: Sorry about that.

Frank: It’s, well, understandable. So, let me call by brother, Hank, and have him bring some meat for us.

Carol: SNORT! Your brother’s name is Hank? So you two are Frank and Hank? Heehehehehe. Oops. Sorry, Frank.

Frank: Hrumph. You are very uncouth, Carol.

Carol: Yes I am.

About half an hour later, Hank arrived with his cart.

Frank: Carol, meet my brother Hank.

Carol: Nice to meet you, Hank. Uh…Hank…you look very familiar. Do you play hockey? Are you from Sweden? Did one of your idols have his jersey retired last night at Rogers Arena?

Hank: Nope. I’m from Hannah, Alberta – just like Frank. Why do you ask?

Carol (disappointed): Oh. Just wondering.

Hank: Yah, so, anyway…I brought all kinds of food for you guys. I’ve got this giant chicken leg, some hot dogs, a big steak, and…my new business partner, Maggie.

Carol: Hi Maggie. Wow! Your hat is awesome!

Maggie: Hi Carol and Frank! Hank and I are now selling meat AND mushrooms. I love mushrooms. In fact, I’m a proud mycophage – the formal name for one who eats mushrooms and fungi.

Carol: Great! I could use a bit of both. What would you suggest?

Maggie: How about a oldie but a goodie? Steak and mushrooms? I’ve got a great rib eye I can cook up and I’ll quick fry up some mushrooms in butter and garlic.

Carol: DIBS! Ha! Frank! You get the wiener! I’m having the rib eye! Maggie, can I please take your portrait while you cook up my delicious dinner?

Maggie: Sure!

Frank: Wait a sec! I get the wiener? Hey, Hank, remind you of anything? Heh.

Hank: I work on a cash-only basis.

Frank: But it’s a perfectly good check!

Hank: No! I’ll make it very clear. you slip me the cash, and I’ll slip you the wiener.

Frank: But I don’t have any cash!

Hank: Then I don’t have a wiener!

Frank & Hank (simultaneously): I love that movie*!


*Name that movie!


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